You: Don’t you miss cheese?
Me: What, do you think I’m a communist!? Of course I miss cheese. But you want to know why I haven’t gone back to my one wedge of manchego per week habit? Cheese tastes different to me now. It’s bitter. Milk too. When I get coffee and they give me dairy instead of soy, not only do I get pimples the next day but it tastes bitter (I return it, it’s not worth the farts and zits). I suspect I was so used to whatever it was that makes dairy taste weird to me now that I just didn’t notice. It reminds me of when I switched tap water for distilled – now Florida tap water tastes chemical. Weird. Anyways, there are some great cheese substitutes out there. My favorite for cheese and crackers is from Dr. Cow.
This company makes a range of tree nut cheeses. Feel free to make jokes, I do. Macadamia and cashew nuts seasoned with delicious exotic things like dulse (a kind of seaweed), hemp (a relative of hops, like in your beer) and Himalayan sea salt. It’s got a good texture for slicing and putting on crackers and is actually a raw food! I wouldn’t consider it a replacement for any particular type of cheese, it’s really a food all it’s own. You might find it’s a little pricey, usually $8 or so for a 2.6 ounce chunk. It’s about the same as you would pay for a similar chunk of seriously fancy aged Spanish cheese like manchego, just without the lactose and cholesterol. I can rationalize it… easy.
I wouldn’t think twice about serving this to strangers at a cocktail party. I love this cheese that much.
This is Christie, signing off… to finish that little cheese wedge.